Liar Liar … Your Dreams On Fire! What ‘lies beneath that keeps you stuck?
by: Carol Chanel
We all tell ourselves lies, about ourselves.
I cringed when I first thought about it. But we all do it.
Tell ourselves things about ourselves that arent true.
You know the voice that says, ‘Im insecure or ‘I dont know how to handle money or ‘Im no good at making friends or ‘Ill never be successful or ‘Im a loser. We make up lies about ourselves and the problem is those thoughts lies keep us stuck.
What is the lie youre telling yourself?
And why is it devastating to your life?
STAR EXAMPLE
What if Hilary Swank had told herself she couldnt act? What if she had told herself she was a loser after getting fired from the TV show 90210.
Hilary Swank is a high school dropout and considered to be the best actress ever by Clint Eastwood. What if instead of following her dream she had listened to lies?
She got the part for the movie ‘Boys Dont Cry Oscar and won an Oscar after getting fired from 90210.
If youve seen her in ‘Million Dollar Baby you know shes done it again listened to her heart not to any lies.
CLIENT EXAMPLE
Im coaching a wonderful 45-year-old woman Helen - who told me and herself that she was dependent and needed others to take care of her.
Now when I listen to her and connect with her I dont pick up dependent.
I feel and hear the strength in her that she has forgotten is there.
And Helen wanted to travel, take workshops, cooking classes, maybe even move to another city. But she was afraid to do those things on her own.
So as we explored this story / lie she began to realize that the story of being dependent came from her mother who was very domineering and wanted to control Helen. She managed to do just that, and Helen let her.
So lets look in more detail at what happened and how Helen dealt with it.
Her mother had been controlling and told Helen she couldnt do anything on her own.
She criticized and judged her; told her she was incompetent, lazy and stupid and could never amount to anything.
She better stick around and let her mother take care of her, otherwise she would need to marry a man to take care of her.
So Helen remained ‘dependent on her mother. She began to believe the lies her mother told her and eventually told herself the same lie ‘Im dependent.
‘Im not like other people, I cant do things on my own.
Like take a vacation alone, or go to a workshop in another city, much less live in another city.
After her mother died, Helen married a man who treated her just like her mother. He really eroded her self-confidence.
Even though she eventually divorced him she still didnt believe she could be independent.
Whenever she wanted to do something for herself, the ‘lie ‘Im dependent would come up and keep her from doing what she wanted to do.
In order to get her unstuck, we revealed the lie and looked at all the times and things she had done in her life that indicated she wasnt dependent on others.
After all, she had divorced her husband, gone to college and lived on campus.
She had changed jobs several times to move up and she was smart.
There were many examples.
She just didnt acknowledge them because she was looking at everything from the perspective of ‘Im dependent.
Once she realized she had done things that a truly dependent woman wouldnt have done, she changed her perspective from ‘Im dependent to ‘Im independent and I can make it on my own and its okay, even healthy, to ask friends for help when necessary.
WHATS YOUR LIE?
Is it: ‘Ill never get married or ‘Ill never be happy or ‘Ill never be able to buy a house in California or ‘Im not good enough to get hired for a job I really want?
Whatever your dream is, if you arent living it, check in with yourself and see if you are telling yourself a lie that is blocking you and keeping you stuck.
Do you want a new career, a new relationship, a better paying job, a different job with fun people, a new wardrobe or to go on an exotic vacation?
If you arent actively working towards something meaningful, you might be telling yourself a lie that is keeping you from having that in your life.
HOW DO YOU MOVE FROM LIE TO TRUTH?
So the first step is to uncover your story / lie.
Once youve done that, look at the negative statement underneath the story.
Thats the lie. Then admit that its a lie.
Someone may have told you that lie, or you may have formed it to protect yourself, or to keep yourself from taking a risk. It can help to know the reason and right now we are focusing on the actual lie.
Once youve uncovered the lie, look to see a new perspective you can choose to stand in.
What would God say about you, what would your angels say, or your best friend, or a loving grandmother or grandfather?
Choose their perspective and stand in that perspective. Throw the lie out.
God, Source, Spirit whatever you want to call the divine, didnt create an imperfect, flawed human being.
We create that with our lies.
You are a child of God, Spirit, Source and that makes you perfect, connected and loved.
So give that love back to yourself. Get up and take an action step toward having what you want.
And when, and if, the lie pops up again tell it to get lost.
Its just a lie. Its not the truth. You are a precious child of the divine.
Thats the truth.
Get moving!
Imagine the possibilities...
© Carol C. Chanel,
2005 Certified Life Coach
C.P.
C.
C.
About The Author
Carol Chanel is a Certified Life Coach who works with clients by phone, from all over the world, to help them get UNSTUCK, have healthy relationships, improve their love lives and feel great about themselves.
You can contact her at:
http://www.carolchanel.
com
mailto:carol@carolchanel.com
310-998-8860
This article was posted on February 16, 2005
.
Create
an Economic Recovery Fund (like the
International Monetary Fund) to Purchase,
Guarantee and Trade the Toxic Mortgages
on the Financial Institution Balance
Sheet , 
Your Ticket to online Income
Recovery from Home.
The
Ultimate Grass Root Bail Out.
Financial Success
is our
#1
Priority
Located on these
(see
below) 106
Domains, selling
FullTime to
500 Million
Buyers with
Multiple Income
Streams
(see below in module
4)
delivering Sales
and Income from
each of the
106 Portals
all
across the Internet
Generating Sales
and Income For
You 24/7, 365
days a Year.
This
Home Income portal implements the most powerful methods for making profits online, and
it is the only online business I have to earn a living.
